The TED Talk is here if you'd like to watch it.
We started with the story that Laura shares in her talk about a woman whose water heater broke during a time diary project. By the time the week was over, dealing with the broken water heater took seven hours out of her life. However, if you had asked this woman at the beginning of the week if she could find seven hours to train for a triathlon or mentor someone, she probably would have said, "No, I'm too busy."
So ultimately it's about priorities, right? Or is it?
One Cobbler suggested that this is just more added pressure to make sure you're making conscious choices about everything. It's social pressure that says, "You wasted those two hours watching TV when you could have been working out...I wear so many hats, the businessing hat, the momming hat, the friend hat, the wife-ing hat. When I'm wearing one, I feel bad about the others that are on the wall. I've only got one head, but..."
To which another Cobbler answered, "You have to stop giving a f*ck."
If only it were that easy, right?
From there we talked about making the choice to live your life. Someone will always say you could be doing X, but at the end of the day it's your life.
A member talked about when her husband passed suddenly how it changed her perspective on her priorities, including when to change the oil in her car. "People talk about time management often, but really time management is actually stress management. It's going to take me the same amount of time to drive here this morning whether I'm calm or stressed. I can be angry at the red lights, and the oil change warning in my car, or I can choose to enjoy the ride. I'm going to get there in the same amount of time regardless."
Another agreed, "but, what you do in your personal life, is not the same as what you can do in your business. I've got people who depend on me, and if I leave the warning light on in the work van they would be right to question how long I'll be in business." Which is also true.
We talked about kids, choosing our lives, keeping our f*cks, how people are different, and how plans can change, but maybe its good to have one anyway.
That's why its so great to have this group of people, every one of us is looking at this work/life balance, the stress of being a business owner, and how to manage our time so that we feel less guilty about which hat we're wearing. None of us really thinks we've got it right, and we all have a different perspective. But, we're all there to help each other out and suggest that, well, a bit of TV time might actually be good for your soul.
The Cobblers' Collective is a weekly meeting of independent business folks, entrepreneurs, and freelancers, hosted by Work Nimbly, Williamsburg’s creative coworking space. It's a safe place where we can troubleshoot problems and help each other grow.
Other links from our conversation:
Free Touch Typing Help
“I write and speak about writing and speaking.”